So I'm really good at biting off more than I can chew.

Semester at Sea 2009.

I have less than three entire days before I get on a plane to go to an entirely different country, but even though it so close, it's so surreal. Up to this point it's been a lot of barely made to totally missed, deadlines, panicing, saving, spending, rushing, calculating, daydreaming and tears. I didn't do it the way I should have, but I definitely did it. And through all of this effort, all of this confusion I am so close to my goal which is only another path to a much bigger goal. This trip is by far the most mind-blowingly overwhelming thing I've ever done. It feels wrong because I've never been to any foreign countries, I definitely don't have the money (I will be paying my loan bills from my urn), I had limited resources and support, I'm not really sure if I'm responsible enough or capable enough.

But all the wrongness makes it right, because I don't see how being out of your element is detrimental, and I know about being a fish out of water. There's nothing like a huge shock to your system to make you wise, to provoke you to be something to never thought of. I want to jarred. I want to be changed. Essentially, if I make it out of this trip alive it'll be worth it and more. And if I don't, it'll still be pretty cool to die in another country. :)